Navigating the Toxic Client - Sometimes You Have to Teach People How to Treat You
Stay in business long enough, and you will encounter at least one very difficult client or toxic client. You know the type. Unrealistic, selfish, overly demanding, extremely critical, and thrives on micromanaging you.
You can refuse to work with such an individual. But life tends to be a bit more complex and nuanced. Perhaps you are a start-up and need the business to help move your enterprise forward.
Maybe your business has plateaued, and this is the client that can significantly enhance your visibility and credibility. It may be that your work with this client means huge profits for you.
If you find that your client is in fact toxic, what can you do to navigate the situation and maintain your sanity?
Understand that a client with a difficult personality often has issues related to control. They are controlling because of their insecurities and shortcomings. That does not give them the right to abuse you, but it is important that you understand why they behave the way they do.
An abusive personality thrives on treating others poorly, so know that no matter how good your work, it will rarely, if ever, be enough to satisfy the overly critical personality. You have to decide whether you want to continue working in a situation where everything you do will be criticized even if you meet every standard and deliverable.
Have someone join you in meetings with your client. With a business partner or someone else you trust in the room, your client might behave better. If they do not, you have a witness.
Sometimes, we have to teach people how to treat us. Stand up for yourself. When your client is behaving in a way that is unreasonable or bullying, do not escalate by shouting, name calling or becoming angry. Calmly ask them to stop. If they do not stop, feel free to gather your things and leave the room or ask them to leave.
Document the instances of your client’s behavior and keep this information in a safe place. Chronicling your encounters with your client will help you work out feelings of frustration and will be helpful if you decide you need to take formal action.
Pay attention to how you are feeling. Having a toxic client may impact your health. Is the dollar value of your contract worth more than your physical, mental and emotional health? No. Do not be afraid to terminate the contract and move on. A client who respects you and knows how to behave well is just around the corner!
